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I’ve commented before that my most brilliant friends all seem to be in their 50’s. At any rate, My beloved office spouse is 40 today…and not exactly happy about the concept. I wrote her a letter on this occasion, and I decided to post it as I thought, “wouldn’t it be beautiful if we all wrote the occasional letter of appreciation to the dearest friends in our lives?”
As you can read- it doesn’t have to be poetic or skillful!
Yet all too rarely do we express appreciation and admiration for those close to heart, who help light the days of our lives.
Ode to my Friend at Forty
“Please, no gifts” said Dave.
Which left me in a bind.
I’m culturally incapable of coming empty-handed…
So, figured I’d write.
(“I hope you don’t mind, I hope you don’t mind, that I put into words….how wonderful life is, with you in the world!”)
I wasn’t sure how this was going to work out.
2001
My boss suggested I study for the license exams with some stranger named Susan.
Reluctant. Who is this woman from FSS unit?
We met in the carpeted halls of ACMHS.
Onward to entire days in Starbucks, workbooks piled about.
Into her hipster home, across from Kotomi.
To long walks with big, sweet Willie.
Belgian fries and exam workshops
She calmly led the way to our licenses.
Practice tests,
Passed the Tests!
We both become Licensed Psychologists, supervisors,
And fumbled, bumbled our way through a funding expansion-
Clueless-but victorious!
Run to the Far Side, my very first 5K
She made me.
Promised we could walk.
Forced me to run. “Come on!!”
I didn’t know I could.
I think about her, every race now. Triathlons and Half marathons…all Susan’s fault!
In Yosemite, my last pre-married hurrah
Hale & Hearty womyn, clambering and hiking
Yosemite bug bunks, peals of laughter, yoga in a cabin
among mountains
A heart stopping, snow-fed river,
impromptu skinny dip.
Then her whispered smile at work: “I’m pregnant!”
I lent her my Mom when Dylan was born.
So small, I feared to touch him.
She plopped D into my arms, the first new baby I ever cradled dear,
nestled into me like he always belonged.
Now we talk Star Wars, and Bakugan, and
he doesn’t remember how he’d toddler dance,
rock out as Sue sang ‘Cutie Pie’,
all the pie slices and Beard Papas puffs dismembered at their kitchen table.
My spouse has totally accepted that
I have an office spouse in Susan.
Shop talk, and more.
How many times have I had to borrow her belief in me?
Practical tips, How to’s, Pep talks, Understanding.
Challenging clients, work nightmares, intern peeves, time to leap-save ourselves!
When P & I were weak, off course, out of sync-
she propped me up.
Again. And again. And again.
Now she and P send Dave and I off to see loud music, Guns ‘N Roses, Metallica
On good days we brunch with her little ones after Sunday yoga.
We host clothing exchanges,
unjealously sharing our most brilliant friends.
Shared adventure stories, Oaxaca, Phuket, Peru, Argentina, Spain, Nicaragua, Japan, Cambodia…shared food obsessions.
Exchanges of yoga pants and dri fit run gear, books, and recipes.
40! Forty! Cuarenta Anos!
What a milestone.
It seems to me, that she does not see
The blooms, and buds, and seeds from her labours of love.
The charms and quirks unique to Sue.
That giggle, that laugh, that sometimes cackle brightens a room like no other.
This year she did battle with the very spectre of death,
And emerged victorious with Dave, to sun another day in Hawaii.
Sweet Kate turned 1
Dylan of my heart will be 6
How tough is this cookie, running races and advancing at yoga
As if that C-section never occurred?
All that a woman should be, more than I previously knew was possible-
She’s lent me strength and confidence ‘til I lost count.
Honest in her imperfections, deeper for them.
You’re not a “late bloomer” Sue, and I know the future with you, for you, will bear new fruits & adventures as you so deserve.
We’re so glad to be your Bay Area family & we love you & your Cuties (starting with Willie!) It’s a blessing to sit in this circle of friendship.
Feliz Cumpleanos, Amiga!
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